If It Were Not So
- Part 7
By Jo Anzalone and Sharon Ferguson
Instantly Cort sized up the situation, pulling Rachel
slightly more beside and behind him. "Mister," he said, his eyes
staring into Bruce's with a steely glare, "this is a lady and I'd be
mighty obliged to you if you'd address her as one."
"Lady?" sneered Bruce. He leaned a bit,
looking at Rachel. "Since when did
you become a lady, Rachel?"
Cort lifted his left hand, pressing its fingertips on
Bruce's chest. "I think it's time you backed off, Mister, and danced with
your own partner."
Bruce brushed Cort's hand away with his forearm.
"Who in hell do you think you are, telling me what to do?"
Cort smiled, quietly, his voice low. "I think I'm
the man who just told you to back off."
"Yeah, you and what army?" Bruce was not a
very original thinker.
Cort cocked his head a bit, studying the man. He was
reminded of the similar types that had crowded the saloon in Redemption. It seemed the basic nature of such men had
remained the same despite the passage of years. The corner of his mouth twitched
slightly. Keeping his voice level, he replied, "I'd advise you to
leave." His mouth twitched again.
"Now."
"Or what?" Bruce said belligerently,
widening his stance preparatory to throwing a punch. Cort pushed Rachel still
more behind him, his muscles all going taut. He had not come here for a
fight. It was not something he welcomed,
not at all. But if he had to, he
would...and he could.
"Hey there, BruceyBabe," came a loud male
voice from behind Bruce. Another man stepped up to his side.
"Yo, Mike, let's buy Brucey a drink. I think he needs one."
"Yeah, Adam, great idea. Great idea, eh,
Brucey?" Between the two of them, they hustled Bruce through the watching
crowd to the bar at the far end of the room, his date scampering along behind.
Cort heard Rachel sigh in relief and he turned to face
her.
"Who were they?" he asked. "Friends of yours?"
^ * ^ * ^ * ^ * ^ *
Rachel didn't know whether to laugh or....well, laugh,
for the suddenness with which more familiar faces appeared to sweep the troll
back under the bridge, or the relief at the idea that she and Cort would not
have to suffer any more tension or high drama.
She heard him ask if she knew them, but only found time to squeeze him
gratefully for stepping to her defense before a round of new voices accosted
them.
"Girlfriend, I don't know where you've been
hiding, but judging by what you've shown up with, no wonder you took your time
coming back!" exclaimed a female
voice behind her. Rachel and Cort turned
to see three girls clustered together, grinning broadly and staring at them
with interest.
"I can't believe it!" Rachel flew to hug all three girls, Bruce
instantly forgotten. Cort had to
clear his throat in order to remind her that he was not as familiar with them
and she obliged with introductions: Janine, Gracie, and Kayla. "We're friends from way back,"
Rachel hurriedly explained, but could go no further, for the band had come back
from a short break and were gearing up for another set. Janine led them to a patio outside the dance
hall where the music could still be heard, but not drown out ordinary
conversation. The entire deck was lit
with fairy lights and gas torches.
"We all used to come here as a group and dance," Rachel
continued her explanation as they settled in lounge chairs in a circle.
"Bruce never was part of that group," Janine
interjected, as if she knew what Cort was thinking. "Although lately he has been
trying," she added with a sneer.
"We only dated a couple of times," Rachel
said, off handed, but as Janine and Kayla began another conversation, she
leaned over and whispered in his ear "Let me go into detail
later?" looking into his face
searchingly, hoping he would understand she needed to be alone to fully explain
what Bruce's little tantrum was about.
Cort nodded solemnly in agreement, _expression
neutral, which Rachel hoped was a sign that he was withholding judgment, but
the nastiness of Bruce's attack still clung to her, despite the happiness of
seeing genuine friends. There had been
enough innuendo in Bruce's words to remind Rachel that she too had a past she
needed to divulge to Cort.
After several minutes of all four girls talking over
each other and trying to catch each other up, Mike and Adam sauntered into
view, looking smug and relieved at the same time.
"You needn't worry about Bruce coming at you
again like that," Mike said to Rachel as she and Cort stood to greet
them. "We put a little bee in that
ragged-ass bonnet of his...next time he made a scene like that with one of our
ladies, we were going to remind him in a very special way of the last
ass-kicking he received." Rachel
covered her mouth to keep herself laughing out loud.
"Mike Duvall, accountant," said the first
guy to Cort, holding out his hand with a big grin. "Adam Duvall, EMT" said the other,
doing the same. Cort shook hands with
them as he introduced himself. Both were
the size of large tree trunks, but as opposite in looks as they could be. Where Mike was dark haired and a merry
blue-eyed cherub in features, Adam was a blazing red-head with craggy nose and
lopsided mouth. Mike found a place next
to Janine and Adam near Kayla. Gracie
disappeared to go find her dance partner.
^ * ^ * ^ * ^ * ^ * ^ * ^
Cort didn't talk much, mostly watched the interaction of Rachel with her friends. All these seemed like nice folk and he was glad she had them in her life. It was still all so new to him, this seeing her in her native setting. Good though, because he needed to know these things about her, what it was like for her to be her.
When Kayla suggested the girls do a line dance,
everyone stood up, so he stood, too, keeping his hand in Rachel's. The concept
of a line dance was explained to him.
Sounded a bit like a row of gals on a stage, but he was game to
watch. Couldn't quite picture Rachel in
such a line, but there was something new popping up around him several times a
minute it seemed. Mike and Adam steered
him to an out of the way place as the girls joined a fairly long line in the
center of the room. Other couples
continued their counter clockwise movements around the large dance floor, the
fastest ones on the outside, the slower ones more toward the middle, then the
line in the center. Seemed to be a
generally-acknowledged way to go about it, prevent collisions and all.
The girls started the dance and he smiled, mostly
because Rachel was laughing with her friends and seemed happy. He liked that. And they were, well, cute as
they did it, the movements fitting together, the legs moving this way and that,
enough stumbles to make them giggle. A bit out of breath, she came back to him,
leaning slightly against him.
"Tired?" he asked, folding his arms around
her.
She nodded, "But good tired. Happy tired."
A nice slow tune started and he began to rock back and
forth with her in his arms just a bit.
"Up for another turn around the floor? I sort of like this holding on thing."
Together they made their way into the slow dance area
and he rested his head against her hair, not moving really very much, just
enjoying the feel of her in his arms, the closeness of her down the length of
his body. When the song was ended, he tipped her chin up with his fingers.
"Could we go for a walk?" he asked.
"I'd like to get out in the air a bit, just look around at
things...with you."
They took their farewells and headed down the
sidewalk, his arm circled around her waist under her shawl. As much fun as dancing with her had been, it
was good to be out of the crowd and the noise.
Noticing a small park across the street and down a bit, he steered them
in that direction. He wanted to get the
feel of cement out from beneath his boots and just walk on...land.
The park had a small fountain in its center where six
walkways converged. There were several
benches scattered about here and there and a goodly number of trees. Not a big park, but nice enough, and only one
other couple on the far edge who were heading back to the street.
"Come," he invited, crossing his legs as he
sat on the grass, patting his lap. She
sat nested in his legs, her arms about his neck, just studying his face in the
moonlight.
"I love the sound of water," he said softly,
turning his eyes toward the fountain.
Then he laughed a little, remembering the glass he had tipped over. "Not much of that around in
Redemption," he added, his gaze centering back on her. For the next few minutes he busied himself
letting the individual curls of her hair wrap about his fingers, his head
cocked in the deep concentration of what he was doing. Then
"You have beautiful hair," he smiled,
shrugging slightly. Wrapping his arms
now about her shoulders, he pulled her against his chest, just holding on,
breathing together. "Miss Rachel," he finally whispered into her
hair, "I think I love you."
Cupping her face again in that way he loved to do, he kissed her...and
didn't stop How could there ever be enough kisses? He had no idea.
^ * ^ * ^ * ^ * ^ * ^ * ^
After the dance and the swirl of regaining erstwhile
friends, Rachel felt as languid and dreamy as a baby in an angel's arms. *Angel* she thought, curled up as she was in Cort's
arms, watching the play of light reflected from the fountain's water highlight
the features she loved best. His face
seemed to glow when he talked to her and now that he sat whispering his love
for her, Rachel wanted nothing more than for them to become statues, forever
formed on the edge of the water.
She wasn't sure why the thought stole back in...she had
to go to work the next morning. That he
wrapped her up completely now, shifting so she could stretch her legs out next
to his and lean into his embrace did not erase the thought either. The day was ending, and even though the
feeling of forever was all around them in the soft night, at one point or
another, she was going to have to go home, sleep and wake up the next morning
for a return to normal.
It was because she was trying to think (as much as she
could with Cort's warm voice in her ear) of other things the two of them could
do...and how much money they would need...and where to get that money...and
well, that meant going back to work.
That, and the message that Sid had left on her machine
at home had been every bit as succinct in his instructions as the nanocreature
could infuse. The words were polite
enough, but the tone promised a remembrance of the last week. He ordered her back for a conference the next
day...could she find a moment in her time with Cort to report for another
assignment?
Rachel sighed.
At least, she hadn't lost her job.
And Cort either had his own intruding thoughts or he
had sensed her drift of mind, for he lifted his head and pressed a benediction
with his lips upon her forehead, as if to wish her peace. When she looked up to meet his gaze, he was
looking a bit perplexed.
"May I ask you something?" He asked.
"Yes."
He started the question a few times, false starts,
before he took a breath and decided to simply lay it flat.
"Who was Bruce to you?"
She smiled rather widely before answering,
inexplicably amused and pleased with the question. She wanted to first tell Cort how wonderful
he was in comparison. But Cort looked
worried he might have trespassed into unstable territory, that she would push
him away, and he began playing with a loose curl as if it would be the last
time he would get to do so, glancing uncertainly at her for reaction.
"Nothing special," she answered, taking the
smile down several notches, and entwined her own finger his own locks, shorter
now, but still a length she adored.
"We went out a couple of times, he got pushy, and I tried to
oblige, but decided I...I...just didn't care for him the way I wanted...to
care...for a man. And he got mad, and
has been hateful since...at least whenever I saw him...which, fortunately, has
been rare these last few months."
She sighed. "I'm sorry he
ruined things..."
"He didn't.
I...I...just wanted..." Cort hesitated, troubled by what he wanted
to know, insecure about what he didn't know...and whether or not he had a right
to ask.
"You want to know if he's got any kind of claim
to me?" Rachel asked, hoping her
own bluntness would help show she wasn't afraid of his questions. "You want to know...how...intimate...I
was with him?"
Cort seemed to blanche slightly at that last question,
but yes, that was the heart of it. He
sat very still, held his breath.
It was Rachel's turn to cup his face.
"When you were in that clinic bed, on the edge of
death, I thought about all the guys I have known, the ones I liked, the ones I
didn't. I've only ever loved one other
man, and...well, things didn't work out.
I made some choices...*he* made some choices... that pretty well ruined
any trust between us." She leaned
her forehead against his and took a deep breath, feeling insecure herself. "I'm no virgin, Cort. I've been... intimate with a man before...just
not Bruce." She slipped her hand
into his and paused a moment to control her voice.
"In fact, that was why Bruce got mad at
me..." she continued.
"Because...because I hesitated...I said no...that I didn't love him
enough to...sleep with him...and I wasn't going to pretend that I loved him
just so I could give him what he wanted...wasn't going to pretend something I
didn't feel just so I could make life...less lonely...." She squirmed a bit, not because of confessing
this to Cort, but the memory of Bruce's antagonism was still distressing. "I mean it when I say I love someone,
Cort. It's why I did NOT say it to
Bruce. I wouldn't have meant it, but I
would have been the one made to be sorry.
And I don't know if he wanted me to love him or if he just thought I
should submit in order to prove his manhood.
Either way, it didn't take long for me to realize he wasn't the one I
wanted. So I...I told him not to come
see me anymore. Guess that was rather
insulting. It hurts to be rejected. But there was no use in acting like there was
something when it wasn't true. And he
knows it... and he tries to take it out on me every chance he gets."
Cort was silent.
"You've no idea how happy you made me when you
asked to court me. I can show you what I
know in my heart." she concluded, kissing him now with small
flutters. He hadn't pushed her away,
hadn't rebuked her. "I know that I
love you."
If It Were Not So now merges with
A Thorne In Diedre's Side and, together, they continue as
Lost in the Empire...