Watching as Brother Sid crossed the road, reaching his hands out towards the gathering kangaroos, she realized too late her mistake. Too bad it was that with his back toward the mansion and his wide hood up, she could not see the satisfied smirk on his handsome face.
************************************************
Sid was aware of all the eyes watching his progress. He turned briefly, a beatific smile glowing on his perfect features and raised one hand as though in blessing. Something within Joimus flashed and gonged "red alert", but...still...the monk chip DID seem to have done its work. What would epis be like without Sid and his constant perverted predations? She looked up at Maximus, standing beside her, his clean gladius grasped in his hand. "Your armor!" she suddenly remembered. "Wait a minute!" She dashed out to the LA city bus, heaving a sigh of relief when she saw her pale yellow gossamer backpack still resting upon the rear seat where she had left it.

"Here!" she said, opening it on the porch, preparing to hand Maximus his 450 pounds of folded armor. For a brief second she was pierced by the memory of having found it abandoned near the base of Victoria Falls.

Maximus saw her shudder, aware as he was of her slightest motion. "Joimus!" he said worriedly, "what is wrong?"

"It was your...leap," she murmured.

"My leap?"

Her eyes misted over. "Through the rainbow."

"Rainbow?" he repeated, confused, having no recollection of his dangerous dive.

She fingered the rust-colored cape, adding, "You...left your...cape."

"On the floor planking of the shearing shed, " he tried to finish.

"No....before...." she whispered.

"Listen, guys," Bud groused, "can Maximus just put on the blasted armor before the kangaroos mob poor Brother Sid?" He clenched the tip of his tongue between his teeth, not able actually to believe those last 3 words had come out of his mouth. He must have been more discombobulated by the sight of the mashed potatoes than he'd realized.

BertiWise, not one to place any great stock in computer chips, shook her head. Always, she hoped Bud would be Wiser as well.

Joimus sighed and dropped her backpack....just as Hando came through the door. In spite of his combat boots, the 450 pounds made a definite ...um.... impression...on his foot. She watched in a strange mixture of wonder and amazement as he executed 3 perfect backward flips, roaring like an elephant seal, landing face down in the pink puddle of punch.

He lay there a long moment, his fingernails clawing Mary's highly polished hardwood flooring. "H...h...hando?" stammered Ando, putting one knee down near his twitching form. Slowly he lifted his head. Russell, usually more empathetic with the characters, stifled a giggle. Hando's face was bright pink. That, in itself, was...um...different...enough. But it was the way lemon slices stuck to each eyebrow, dangling like circular flaps of citrus over his eyes, that really made Russell lose control. Then, each time Hando blinked, the lemon slices bobbed up and down, moved by the Melbourner's long eyelashes.

Ando glared at Joimus, looking in from the porch. The Pittsburgher shrugged. "Well, Ando, look on the bright side, " she said cheerily, "at least now his denim is pink on both sides!"

Just then Sue arrived with Cort, he of the lips coated heavily in dust. "Oh, MY!" Sue commented, looking from Ando to Hando. "TPP's!"

"No, my dearest," Cort gently corrected, "there is but one 'pee' in 'teepee'." She smiled at him fondly, not caring in the least that he

was a good century and a half out of date.

It was a mark of his inner bodily grace, or perhaps just that his muscles were coiled and ready for wanton destruction of everything in his range, that, given his position and...um... coloring....Hando could gain his feet so very much like a panther. In one smooth motion he slid the offending lemon slices from his orbital sockets and flung them across Mary's dining room where they came to rest in unmentionable locations on Berti's mashed potato sculpture.

Russell completely lost it, clutching the mantel, his shoulders heaving in a fit of wild giggling. Hando turned toward the actor, retrieving his switchblade as he moved. A large hand grasped Hando's wrist.

"No you don't," said Aubrey, softly but firmly. "We need Himself." The Captain narrowed his seagreen eyes, looking sincerely into the young Melbourner's. "Where would we be without him?"

Unseen, someone else had arrived at Mary's birthday party. Accompanied by a chuckle, the new voice rumbled, "And I...I need him most of all!" Everyone turned to look at the newcomer.

"Who are YOU?" Bud asked, suspicious of the 5 foot 11 and a bit man with dark, wavy brown hair.

"Braddock," the stranger said, seagreen eyes dancing, "Jim Braddock." He extended his hand in an open, friendly gesture to the cop. Bud took it, giving it a hearty shake, having heard the rumors that they might shortly be joined by a new character. "OW!" Jim said, wincing. "I broke it not long ago and it's taking a long time to heal."

Several of the characters crowded around, greeting Jim. "What line of work are you in?" Alex asked, interested.

Jim got a bit of a faraway look in his seagreen eyes before answering, "I'm a... dockworker....right now. But I have...plans.. hopes.

Young Jack introduced himself, "My name's Corbett. J. Corbett."

Jim's eyes widened, "Not Gentleman Jim, the boxer??"

Young Jack laughed, "No, that was Errol Flynn, I believe."

Amanda looked confused. "What ARE they talking about?" she asked.

"I'm not sure, Amanda," said Mary kindly, "but it seems to be old boxing movies for some reason."

Russell eyed Jim carefully. "You," he said, his voice low. "It's because of you my shoulder got all out of whack."

"Me?" Jim replied, a bit taken aback.

"Don't worry," Russell added, smiling. "Jodie Foster and I are still friends." Jim was lost, totally unable to fathom what he, Jodie Foster, and Russell's shoulder had in common.

Out on the porch, Maximus had just buckled his last buckle, latched his last latch, sheathed his last sword. Joimus smiled, watching with her heart full of...well...fullness....as he swished his rust-colored cape about his shoulders, tying its tie. Ah, back where it belonged...right side out, too... and on her General, fully gourded (though possibly not fully seeded!). Together they came inside as the character clump turned toward them.

Jim, rather simply dressed, was impressed with the, admittedly, most impressive character. "And is this the great man himself?" he asked Bud.

Well," Russell piped up, "he IS the great man....but I'm the only one around here who gets to be called Himself."

Jim shook his head. Being a part of THIS group was gonna be a bit of an effort.

"I thought I was sorta great," murmured Aubrey.

Shhh, dear," Judith said, "You ARE great....indeed!" She giggled like a young wench as she recalled his greatness.

Andy nudged Johnny. "Heck, the only place HE'S greater than we are is around the middle!"

Maximus hushed them with a look. "There is, you know, much advantage to being older and wiser." In his case, in particular, it often led to being asked to be the Protector of Rome.

"Did someone say 'wiser'?" asked Berti, ever alert for any connection to Bud.

"Maximus did," Russell rejoined.

"Did what?" asked Bud.

"Said 'wiser'," Russell repeated.

"Maximus himself said that?" asked Bud again.

"NO!" shouted Russell, "I'm Himself, not Maximus!"

"Hey," Bud came back, "I may have been shot a few times in the head, but I damn well know YOU are NOT Maximus!"

Russell rolled his seagreen eyes, looking at the General. "Not entirely true, Bud," he murmured, "not entirely true."
 

Meanwhile, thank goodness, back out at the edge of the grazing lands, Sid had carelessly planted a foot squarely on a steaming mound of fresh kangaroo offal. Ando, had she witnessed this, would surely have smiled that it had not happened to Hando. Though it might yet. One could never be all that sure of such things.

As the warm brownness squished upwards between his toes, Brother Sid somehow lost all desire to bless the large brown rodents. He glanced back over his shoulder, noticing that all the cast seemed now to be inside...well, all that is except for the one reclining on the patio lounger, spreading her skirt widely to the sun, and the overly-fuzzed one who watched her with puzzled eyes. He glared at the mob of roos, holding his fingertips a few inches away from each other, blue sparkles of electricity flashing back and forth.

First they sat back on their tails, concerned, then as he lifted his hands toward them, full-blown panic set in and they fled toward the distant ocean, planning to regroup On the Beach. Sid smiled. He liked that movie. Australia should be more like that. No people. Just papers blowing down the streets. And him. He looked back at the big house, dreaming of papers blowing through its empty dining room. And Pittsburgh. Pittsburgh should especially have only papers blowing down its streets. Perhaps he could...arrange it. His seagreen eyes narrowed as he recalled Joimus' evil 'arrangements' for him. Turn him into some mealy- mouthed, smiley-faced, goody-two-shoed monk, would she!!!

He looked down at his offaled toes. She had even denied him the shoes! Then he smiled....a long, slow smile with no goodness of heart behind it. Maximus might have his faux fur, but he had his sly similitude of a slot!! A monk chip indeed! HA! How easily he had fooled them....fooled them all. Just a few wobbles, a hop here and there, and they thought they had him! The fools! It was almost too easy.

"Hello, Sid," came a small voice. He looked down. It was the English rabbit. Could he trust her or would there be stew for dinner?

"How long have you been there?" he asked, suspicion filling his tones.

"Long enough," she replied, her eyes lingering on the soft brownness around his pedal regions. "Having a hard day, are we?" she continued, stepping out from under the fence, giving her cottontail a seductive fluff.

He grinned. The English wabbit was obviously not interested in revealing the truth of his unreprogramedness. No, she had...other ...revelations in mind.

"How do you intend to impress Joimus and the rest of the cast now that your kangaroos have all fled the scene?" she asked.

"It may not be necessary," he replied, casting a seagreen glance back at the mansion. "I heard sounds of new-character-arrival and they are all quite distracted... For the Moment." Again he grinned, loving as he did the snatching of other character's movies for his own use. He thought back over the long months to the release of Lachlan's DVD. His plan to totally dismember the film had succeeded beyond his wildest dreams. Absolutely everyone had returned their copies, leaving the airman mostly unviewed... just the way he liked the lesser characters (which was any character not named Sid).

A sudden clip-clopping on the dirt road made them turn their heads. It was a small cart, drawn by two Hampshire ewes, little bells tinkling on their harnesses. A woman neither had seen before in epiland stepped out of it and mounted the steps of the mansion.

Joimus came to the door, greeting her with extended arms. "Jewelie!" she cried delightedly and, turning, introduced the newcomer to those gathered within. "Everybody, this is Jewelie from Chicago! Here, meet Jim, our other newcomer." Joimus guided Jewelie through the crowd and up to Braddock. "Jim, meet Jewelie. She's a real gem!"

Bud narrowed his seagreen eyes. "How," he asked reasonably, can SHE be Jim when HE'S Jim?"

"No, no, Bud," Joimus laughed affectionately, patting one of the cop's bulging biceps, "He IS Jim! She's a gem!"

"That's what I.....never mind," he muttered, wandering off toward the birthday cake.

Himself stepped forward, commenting, "Weren't you at the concerts?" Indeed she had been!

"Yes," she replied, smiling shyly. "I left right afterward to start my journey to DroogHeeda. Sheep, you know, don't travel all that fast," she explained, recalling the many perils they had faced crossing the Bering Strait on the melting ice floe, not to mention the lack of good sheep routes through Malaysia.

"Ah," he said, nodding, "then that would explain your absence in the Valley of the Kings."

"Valley of the Kings?" Jim asked, puzzled. "Where was I?"

Himself grinned. "You weren't?"

I wasn't?"

"Nope," Himself continued with a chuckle, "I hadn't been you yet."

"Does that mean," Jim said, trying to get all this straight, "you are me NOW?"

"Yes, indeed!" Russell replied.

"But....but...." Jim stammered, unable fully to grasp the concept, "how....?"

"Let me see if I can explain," Russell added kindly. "I just started being you. That's why you're just now arriving in the epis. You simply 'weren't' before."

Jack laughed heartily, slapping Jim on the back. "You're confusing him, Russell!" he chortled. "Jim, Himself was me most recently, but now he's you."

Jim staggered almost as though Max Baer had thrown a left hook.

Jewelie was moved by his obvious distress. "It's all right, Jim," she said softly, "I hear the characters finally do get used to it."

Jim looked at her, his seagreen eyes filled with gratitude. "Do they really?" he asked hopefully.

Jewelie glanced at the door where Sid was just entering. "Well, some do more than others."

Bud stood, contemplating the cake a long while in silence. Mary, never having gotten to blow out a single candle, much less the full 75, was eager to serve some of it. "Here," she said brightly, "have a piece of....of....um....cheek!" She scooped off a big chunk of Berti's mashed potato sculpture and plopped it onto a plate. "Would you like that with ice cream or... perhaps...gravy?"

Bud did not answer her, but just stared at the large indentation left in the replica. It hurt just to look at it and his hand went involuntarily to his rear.

Out on the patio, the warm sunshine was making Zack drowsy. For hours now he had watched Susan, her strange new attitude and actions completely baffling him. He leaned his furry head back, letting his heavy lids close.

Susan, peeking out from under her own almost- closed lids, smiled as she lifted his water glass, pouring a large splash into her cupped palm. Her eyes studied the front of her gown where the long months of travel grime, mixed with the lime and the dehydrated manure formed a fairly decent seedbed. She dribbled the water carefully, dampening some of the folds that appeared a bit dry. Her gaze then lit on the round glass top of the patio table. "Hmmmmm?" she thought, remembering her backyard greenhouse where she sprouted her blue poppy seeds. Twisting to the side, she picked up the circular pane, settling it across the arms of her chair above her skirt. Perhaps THIS would increase the motility of Maximus' seed! Satisfied, she, too, napped.

Sid, having propitiously for himself glanced out toward the patio just then, saw an opportunity for such Maximus-mayhem as to delight his soul....had he had one of those. "Pardon me a moment," he murmured to Bunny, excusing himself for a brief foray onto the patio. With soundless steps he approached the sleeping duo.

"So!" he said to himself, "the EnglishPoppy has a private agenda, eh?"

He was pleased, thinking he could not have planned it better himself. Leaning forward carefully, he briefly lay both palms atop the glass. Though maintaining its basic shape across the arms of the chair, the glass seemed somehow to flow and for the merest nanosecond, actually merged with his palms as blue electricity currented back and forth. He stepped back, the glass looking completely normal again, and watched as the brilliant Australian afternoon sun shone down through it, the golden beams changed to blue by their passage through the transmogrified molecules of the circular pane. He batted his long lashes, grinning widely. So...Joimus would make arrangements for HIM, eh!
                             

Turning, he walked back to Bunny. "Shall we join the party?" he asked, pulling his brown hood back up into a more facially-concealing position.

Susan slept, unaware of the effect the blue sunlight was having on Maximus' seed. There, within its cozy damp bed of grime and lime and dehydrated manure....dare we even SAY it?.....germination... *gasp*....began. Seed after seed began to crack and the tiniest of tendrils creep forth into the blue light that infused their cellular structure. Speeded dramatically by the light, the tendrils soon formed a network of vines and leaves across her skirt. A moment more and she had blossomed, completely missing the moment in her slumbers. All too soon the flowers faded and the small, rounded forms of dozens of tiny gourdlings began to appear.

Joimus, needing a breath of fresh air after noticing Sid's return, walked out onto the patio. Seeing the sleeping pair and afraid they would miss Mary's party entirely, she walked over to wake them. How strange the way Susan had placed the glass table top across the arms of her chair like that. "Sus....," she began softly, but stopped, transfixed by the sight of the vines creeping down the Englishwoman's gown. Her jaw dropped. She was stunned! Instantly she had recognized the fruit of Maximus' seed. Filled with a terrible mixture of despair and anger, tears streaming down her face, she ran back into the dining room.

There he was, standing there in his rust-colored cape, looking so magnificent...so...so... innocent! Her heart breaking, she crossed the floor, and stood silently before him, her breath coming in little sobbing gasps. "How COULD you?!?" she finally cried, then turned and ran out of the mansion. With her left hand, she squeezed tightly the fingers of her right as she ran. She had almost slapped him!

Maximus looked as though he had been run over by a truck...er...chariot. Sid, pulling his brown hood halfway over his face, stifled a full-out laugh. "Perfect! Absolutely perfect!" He guided Bunny toward the cake. "Rump of Cop, my dear?" he asked, picking up a dessert plate.

Maximus seemed rooted to the spot. Never, not in the Germanian forests, not in the Zucchabarian arena, never had he been so shocked as by the sight of Joimus' tear-streaked face and the furious hurt in her words. Wide-eyed, he turned and looked helplessly at Aubrey, who shrugged and shook his head in equal puzzlement. Russell, too, shook his head, saying, "I have no idea." He turned at the sound of a small commotion, briefly wondering why Bunny had smashed a plate of mashed potatoes against the chest of the ChipMonk. Then he added, "Shall we go after her?"

"No," Maximus said, his rumbly voice shaking a bit, "I need to go...alone." He took 2 or 3 slow steps at first as though gathering himself, then ran quickly out the entrance, his gladius clanking against the doorframe as he passed.

Having noticed that Joimus had come from the patio, Russell decided to investigate there. Susan and Zack were sleeping in the sun. "Zack!" he bellowed. Both Zack and Susan awakened abruptly, jumping to their feet. The table top crashed to the stone flagging, shattering into thousands of shards. Russell's eyes narrowed as he beheld Susan's skirt, tiny gourdlings dangling down its lower front like ornaments on some Christmas garland.

Lucilla, who had followed Russell, gasped. "Maximus' missing seed!"

"WHAT?" shouted Russell, "What are you SAYING??"

Lucilla pointed a shaking finger at Susan's skirt. "Maximus' seed," she repeated, shaking her head in wonder.

Zack was clenching the rim of the table top so tightly his knuckles had gone all white. "SUSAN!" he sobbed, "YOU....with...with....Maximus?"

Susan stood there, her eyes all round and watery, looking back and forth from Russell to Zack, her lower lip trembling. "I...I....," she stuttered, "I ... can ... explain....."

Zack let go of the table rim and pressed both fists hard into his eye sockets.

"It...it was on the bus," Susan said softly.

"On the BUS?" Russell roared. "You and Maximus...on the BUS?!?" He was so disturbed, so agitated, that he began to walk in tight little circles, his fists clenching and unclenching.

Zack had moaned and sunken to his knees. Russell pointed at him, then angrily spat words at Susan. "I thought the stewardess gave him grief enough...but....YOU! Look what you have DONE to him!"

Susan trembled from head to toe, her gourdlings dancing on her skirt. Russell watched them, so obviously Maximus', then said, his voice all hard and cold, "Have you no shame, Susan, displaying your...illicit... fruit so...so...publicly?"

Susan, having only just been so rudely awakened, had actually not been fully able to process the fact that not only had she blossomed, but also fruited, all while sleeping. She gazed down the front panel of her long gown in amazement. "I...I...had no idea," she murmured. Zack just moaned again.

"Hah!" Russell exploded, "you said you had done it on the bus!"

"No," Susan tried to explain, "I just got my dress coated in Maximus' seed on the bus."

Zack doubled completely over, pounding his forehead on the paving stones. "But...but... Maximus was Zorro on the bus," she continued.

"Zorro...Maximus...it's all the same seed," Russell accused.

"Yes," she said, "but...the seed was loose...."

Zack lifted his tear-streaked, fuzzy face. "Maximus was sick, " he said, wiping the back of his hand across his wet eyes, "so YOU were the 'loose' one!"

"You don't understand!" she cried, desperation creeping into her voice. "I was just sitting in my seat and...."

"Likely story," broke in Russell. "I've heard enough!" He helped Zack to his feet and the two men strode back into the house.

"Wow!" exclaimed Lucilla, torn between being glad her portion of Maximus' seed hadn't gotten on her outfit and a sense of jealousy over the fruitfulness of Susan's gourd-laden skirt.

Susan narrowed her eyes at Lucilla. "Why didn't you say anything?" she asked angrily.

"It wasn't in my script," Lucilla replied with a slight shrug.

"There IS no script!" cried Susan.

"Right!" said Lucilla. "That's why it wasn't in it."

Susan sank wearily back into her chair, looking down at the still-growing baby gourds. After a while, a small smile curved one corner of her mouth. "They ARE Maximus'," she comforted herself, running a finger lightly over the curve of the top-most gourd.

Russell, his face still red with anger, walked up beside Aubrey.

"What is going on?" the Captain asked.

"It's Susan Guildford," Russell hissed, "she has fruited from Maximus' seed."

"WHAT?" gasped Aubrey. "Not Susan?"

"It's true," Russell said, his shoulders beginning to sag. "It happened on the bus."

"My God," Aubrey sighed, looking out the doorway, ".....Joimus."

Russell closed his eyes, "I know....I know."

Maximus, his cape flying behind him, ran through the rose garden calling, "Joimus! Joimus!" A small piece of pale yellow gossamer hung from a thorn near the path. He removed it, lifting it to his face. "Oh, Joimus," he sighed, "where are you?"

He looked in the shearing shed, the pea patch, but she was nowhere to be found. Stopping, he stared back at the mansion, noticing for the first time that Jewelie's ewe-cart was gone. He sprinted for the stable, grasping the mane of a large, black stallion and swinging himself and all 450 pounds of armor, up onto its strong, bare back. Digging in his heels, he galloped down the narrow, dirt road.

Joimus, unable to see clearly through her tear-coated eyeballs, tore across the Australian outback, shouting, "Hut, hut, hut!" to the ewes, knowing that was, of course, the way one spoke to camels but having no idea of how to encourage sheep to gallop. Little tinkling bells broke loose, lying along the lane like a trail of golden breadcrumbs. She glanced briefly over her shoulder. A black dot in the midst of a distant dust cloud told her that Maximus was coming. Fresh tears stung her eyes. "He had....my God...he had....seeded Susan!" That there were tiny gourds now in this world....gourds from...from...HIM....implanted over the front of her gown for everyone to see....it was beyond bearing!!

She reined left, guiding the panting ewes off the lane, cutting through a field of wildflowers. The rim of one wooden wheel crashed into a rock, splintering, flipping the cart. She landed face-down, hard, gasping from a pain in her knee. Not even trying to rise, she lay there, sinking her fingers into the soil, pressing her lids tightly closed. In a moment, little tearing sounds caused her to turn her head. The ewes, harnesses dragging, were munching the wildflowers. They looked so adorable she almost smiled at them. As a child she had often dreamed of having her very own Hampshire ewe, but, no, she only had angus calves. Angus....like Russell raised. Russell...who had once been Maximus. Maximus ... who had .. seeded..... Biting her lip against the pain, she struggled to her feet. She would NOT lie there in the wildflowers for him to find her! No!

Hearing the nearby burble of a river, she limped in that direction. A large, wide board lay half-buried on the bank. Perhaps? She tugged and pulled, managing to free it, then set it on the water. Lying down upon it, she used one foot to kick herself away from the edge...then she simply...floated away.

Maximus' anxious eyes saw where the trail of bells left the lane, where the wildflowers had been bent down by a passing ewe-cart. He would have stood in his stirrups, raising himself up for a better look, but there did not happen to be stirrups in this particular epi. He thought he saw the distant corner of a tipped cart and rode in that direction. Yes! It WAS the cart! And it had crashed! Leaping from the stallion, he called, "Joimus! Joimus!" as he frantically searched the area. Where WAS she? He lifted the overturned cart. She was not there.

The sheep grazed happily nearby on the wildflowers, giving no indication of her whereabouts. He saw an area of flattened wildflowers and the marks her fingers had made. A trail of bent flowers led off towards a small river. Calling her name, he ran. At the bank, he saw where she had pulled something wide and flat from the soil. Her footprints led to the water...and were gone. She was nowhere to be seen. He whistled for his horse, mounted, and rode downstream along the riverbank, still calling her name over and over until his voice cracked on a sob.

She had left him. He didn't understand. Why would she leave? Darkness was settling across the sheep station as he turned his horse back toward the house. Russell heard the sound of slow hoofbeats approaching the mansion. He ran down the steps, followed by Aubrey.

"Did you find her?" Russell called.

Maximus dismounted, laying his arms over the horse's back and resting his forehead between them. Without lifting his face, he replied almost inaudibly, "She...she took the ewe-cart. I followed it to where it had crashed in a field of...wildflowers."

"Crashed?" repeated Aubrey. "Is she all right?"

Maximus inhaled deeply and raggedly, then slowly raised his head, looking at his two friends in the dusk. "She left me," he said, his face contorting. "Why? Why did she leave me?"

Aubrey and Russell exchanged looks, each not wanting to be the first to say the terrible words. Finally Russell gulped, saying, "Maximus, it was your seed."

"My..my...seed?" the General said, not comprehending.

"Yes," Aubrey added, "Susan has borne the fruit of your seed."

Maximus' brow furrowed deeply. "I have not seeded Susan," he stated.

Aubrey and Russell looked at one another again. "Indeed, Maximus, her fruits are unmistakably from your seed."

Maximus growled, "I have NOT seeded Susan!"

"How then do you explain that she bears, even now, upon her gown, swelling gourdlings of your making?"

"Gourdlings?" he said. "MY gourdlings?"

"Yes," Russell affirmed. "Yours."

"But...but...is not Susan with Zack?"

"She was," sighed Aubrey, "but no longer. He is heartbroken at what you two have done."

"But I have done NOTHING!" protested the General.

Bud arrived, slightly dragging a reluctant Lucilla. "I think I have detected the answer," he said, detectively-speaking. "It was the white rhino."

"Rhino!" huffed Aubrey. "Those were no rhino seeds!"

"Besides," Russell added, his years of cattle breeding experience finally paying off, "from what I understand, it's nigh well impossible for a rhino and an Englishwoman to reproduce."

"Remember Ando and the Nile hippo, " Aubrey reminded him.

"Yes, but she escaped up a date palm as I recall," Russell added.

"STOP!" bellowed Bud. "I don't mean the rhino's SEEDS, for Pete's sake!"

"Well, then," Aubrey retorted, "you shouldn't have said the rhino did it, now should you?"

"But he DID do it!" Bud said. "He stepped on Maximus' gourd!"

"What?" Maximus said, his brow creasing again. "My gourd? When? Where?"

"It was on the Plains of Sheba. I called you 'Maximus' and you lost your gourd...and the rhino stepped on it!"

"He's right," Lucilla said. "He crushed it and your seed spilled out into the plains grass. I know. I was there." Tremblingly she held out a large piece of broken gourd shell, the seeds she'd gathered glistening within its curve.

"My...my...seed?" Maximus said, looking at it wonderingly. "But...I had....other....plans... for that."

Aubrey smiled, thinking to himself that Maximus' other plans had probably been a lot better than to have them end up in a broken section of gourd shell.

"Here," Lucilla said, "You can have them back."

Maximus took the piece of shell in his strong hands. "But... what do I DO with it NOW?" he asked no one in particular. Which was good as no one in particular had ANY idea! "Is there an answer in the script?" he said, looking almost blankly at Russell.

Himself just shook his head. "You know there is never a script."

"Truly," said Aubrey, nodding in complete agreement. "Never....ever."

Together, the group went back inside, Maximus carefully holding the shell. "Don't spill it in the punch," Aubrey chortled, "or the whole female cast will....." He stopped when Russell glared fiercely in his direction.

BertiWise grabbed Bud's arm. "Where's Joimus?" she demanded.

"I don't know," he replied, "Maximus says she left."

"She LEFT?" BertiWise exclaimed. "She can't leave!!"

"She did," Maximus added, his voice heavy with sadness. "She just....floated away."

Sid, still wiping the last of the mashed potato from the front of his robe, chortled, "Success!!! Ding, dong, Joimus is gone!"

Terry overhearing, grabbed the ChipMonk roughly. "Maximus!" he called, "Sid knows something about this!"

Maximus strode across the room, yanking back Sid's hood. "YOU!" he spat. "I should have known you were behind this!"

Sid folded his hands as though in prayer. "Me? Why, I'm just a good little ChipMonk, I am!"

Maximus' fist put an end to that falsehood.

Joimus, lying on her back on the board, trailed her fingers in the water as the current carried her rapidly downstream. She stared at the stars, vaguely recalling someone once having said, "This water lives in Mombasa." But she was Out of Africa now....wasn't she? In an epi, one could never tell just where the waters of a river might actually carry one, geography being a thing more often ignored than not. As so often also was...time.

As she watched, her feelings too numb to care, the Southern Cross wavered, would it be replaced by the North Star. "Hmmmm?" she thought, "strange." She didn't really care, though. What difference did the stars make any more? What difference did anything make any more? The General was not who she had always believed him to be. There were no tears left. She closed her eyes and slept, drifting along atop the board. Alone. Or...was she?